Museum Of Pop Archaeology: July 2008

Yes, President Lincoln, The Roadway To Heaven Is Paved With Tattoo Ink and Bridal Veils

That Joke Was Probably Sexist But There's Precious Little To Be Done About It Now Because I've Just Signed Out My Tab

When Used Properly Wheat Grass Has A Gentle Laxative Effect But I Wouldn't Do A Shot At The After Party

I Met A Tragic Beauty At The Roger Ebert Overlooked Film Festival In Champagne-Urbana And Even Though I Know We Feel The Exact Same Way About Tron I Can Discern That In Six Months We'll Be Combing Each Other's PDA's For Genetic Evidence Of Our Betrayals (Version)

She Called Me A Misogynist, And I Was Like All, What Are You Talking About, I've Never Even Thought About Applying To Medical School, What's The Deal Yo Are We Going to Weinerschnitzel Or Not?

What's The Deal With These Airports? Can You Believe These Airports? Now You Gotta Pay 50 Dollars Just To Check A Second Piece Of Luggage? Am I Right? Of Course I'm Right. And What's The Deal With The Security Detail At The Airports? Hey, Officer, Is That A Laser Wand In Your Hand Or Are You Just Happy To See Me? You Know What I'm Talkin' About, Yes, You Do. And What's The Deal With Airplane Food? Where Does The Airplane Food Come From? Is It Even Real Food? I Don't Know! You've Been A Great Audience, Tip Your Waitress, I'll Be Here All Week, Try The Vichysoisse When You Get A Chance, Good Night! (Part 1)

Stupid, Worthless, No Good, Goddamn, Freeloading Son Of A Bitch. Retarded, Big Mouth, Know-It-All, Asshole, Jerk. You Forgot Ugly, Lazy And Disrespectful. Shut Up Bitch. Go Fix Me A Turkey Pot Pie. No Dad, What About You? Fuck You. No Dad, What About You? Fuck You. Dad, What About You? Fuck You. Slap.

If Your Girlfriend Mentions Even The Barest Affinity For The Films Of John Hughes Then That's A Clear Signal That She Is Stuck In A Nostalgic Loop That Has Nothing To Do With Achieving Any Form Of Equilibrium And You Should Probably Dump Her And Hit A Milk Bar Or Something

I Disagree With You, Brendon, I'm Not Asking You To Turn Into A John Hughes Fan Overnight, Or Even At All, But You Can't Just Assume There's No Value To His Work, Whether Achieved Through Simple Cultural References And Easy Juxtapositions Or No, The Fact Is That Hughes Films Burned Themselves Into The Subconscious Of The Teenager Of The Eighties, And That Persists As A Sentimental Touchstone, Who Are We To Object To Sentimentality's Role In The Formation Of Our Collective Ideals, Plenty Of Other Cultures On The Marginalia Of Poverty Don't Have The Luxury Of Emotive Reasoning And We Should Acknowledge That We Are Fortunate To Employ That Kind Of Evaluative Process.

Your Point Is Well-Taken Sufjan, But The Rest Of The Band And I Are Of The Opinion That All Pop Nostalgia Is To Be Mistrusted, And Yes I Appreciate The Irony Of That Position Because There May Come A Time When All Three Of Us Entities May Well Be Relegated To Mere Pop Nostalgia, Who Knows It May Come Sooner Than Any Of Us Think, But That Doesn't Mean We Need To Limit Our Artistic Outreach To That Faction That Responds To The Immediately Disposable Whims Of Our Culture, We Need To Determine How We Reinforce Our Art, If You Will, Because While We Are Indeed A Little More Well Off Financially Than We Were Before, Ultimately The Aim Of The Artist Is To Produce Something That Will Endure Beyond His Own Frame Of Reference, We Need To Use Our Projective Skills To Analyze And Determine How We Do That, And Though I Think It's Perfectly Fine To Enjoy John Hughes Movies As Artifacts Of Their Time, Or Even Wield A Nostalgic Fondness For Them, We Cannot Pretend That Hughes' Movies Are An Acceptable Substitute For Those Endeavors That Are Borne From Storytelling Or Simple Individual Expression But Which Wind Up Harnessing Infinite Truths That Ensure Their Endurability Throughout Future Generations, For Even Though The Temporal Immediate Rewards May Not Impress Us, The Eternal Reward Will Await Us All And Will Bear Itself Out As The Most Satisfying Reward For Both Our Souls And The Soul Of The Cosmos.